Voice of Nola (MIH 32)

Told y'all it was coming.

Roughneck F@#% Yo Couch Tour

(Editors note: If you’re underage and you watch this, your mom’s gonna be bummed. Oh, and the player might take a second to load.)


The footage from F@#% Your Couch Tour was just chilling in the TeamJaded vaults until Johnny Roughneck gave me a call a few weeks ago and asked me to put it together as a companion piece to the new Roughneck tour video, Decade of Aggression. So I did.

If you’re in the bay area, the premier for Decade of Aggression should be soon. When I know you'll know so you can go check it out.

The Back Story:

Some of y’all may have noticed that we give a lot of props to Roughneck Hardware on TeamJaded. That’s because Roughneck is down and we’re down for Roughneck. If that doesn’t explain it for you I’ll go into a little more detail. Roughneck is a skateboard hardware brand based out of San Francisco and run by one John Griffon, aka Johnny Roughneck. More importantly Roughneck is dirty, D.I.Y., and run by skaters for skaters.

I first met Johnny a couple of years ago when I produced a brand profile on RNCK for Current TV. I knew about RNCK through skating in S.F. I even had some friends who worked with Johnny, but I’d never actually met him, and I was a little nervous about asking him to work with me because he had a reputation for being, well… a Roughneck.

It didn’t help that our main friend in common told me that he’d talk to Johnny about it and never even mentioned it to him. So I bit the bullet, played the internet-working game, and got in touch with him myself. To my surprise he was both willing to and excited about working with me.

When I met him in person any vestiges of what I thought he was going to be like vanished. He was welcoming, helpful, and just down for skateboarding, and I really respected that. If you’ve ever watched that interview then you know that you can’t help but get caught up in Johnny’s excitement for skateboarding and that excitement translates into what Roughneck is about. If you haven't watched that interview, here it is:



After that day, I was just as down for Roughneck as Roughneck was down for skateboarding and I went to every Roughneck event I possibly could, from the Go Skateboarding Day Race Down Market St., to the Annual BART Tour, to whatever. Over that time period Johnny and I became friends and I made it a point to keep him posted on my video projects so that if another opportunity opened up for us to work together I could jump on it.

The F@#% Your Couch Tour was just that opportunity. I was on my way down to the mojave desert for a shoot with Gordy Toth (the biker). I don't ride bmx or anything, but I'd heard from my friend Jon Rogers at TBC Party, that he had the most insane backyard in the world and I just wanted to check it out. On my way I was going to pass through the Element YMCA Skate Camp. Coincidentally, Johnny was headed down to skate camp to premier the Roughneck video, so we formed like Voltron and the F@#% Your Couch Tour was born. He roped in the Oakland Kids and Hidehiko. I brought Swyler. And we hit the road. We both thought it was going to be hilarious to have such a random group of people in a van together going to such a random collection of places, and it pretty much was.

Watch the video. Fuck Yo Couch.

Credits

Produced and Edited by
Jeremey Lavoi
Co-Produced in Post by
Abby Berendt

Filmed by
Hidehiko Fujiwara
Jeremey Lavoi
Tyler Moore

Tour Members

In the Captains Chairs
Johnny Roughneck, Hidehiko Fujiwara, Tyler Moore, and Jeremey Lavoi.

Sitting anywhere in the van where they could fit
Chubbs, Lil’ D, Jon Stallings, Errol Langdon, and Major Jones.

Music by

John Phillips
Antagonist

Jeremiah Sinkie
remember the name (run the beat remix)
ccmixter.org

House Thug Productions
Militainment

Albertsx1965
Coast to Coast
ccmixter.org

Lilnohm
Inthebigining
ccmixter.org

House Thug Productions
Chug Life

Coffeetrim
Open Your Eyes (long island remix)
ccmixter.org

Gautch
Mumbo Jumbo
ccmixter.org

Mother Ship
When You Fell Down
myspace.com/mothership6666

John Phillips
Pestulance

Music Notes

A large chunk of the music in this piece came from ccmixter.org, which is a user generated music site that operates under creative commons licensing. Check it out. The rest of the music came from my friends John Phillips, Tyler Moore (House Thug Productions), and Aaron Collins (Mother Ship). Thanks y’all.

And for those of you wondering what's up with the Make It Happen vids, don't worry more Make It Happen will be coming at you soon. We've got all kinds of good stuff coming down the pipeline. Look out for the Chuck Perkins Vlog coming at y'all shortly.

Rupa and the April Fishes

This is our holiday treat for y’all, produced by our friend Nicolette Bethea. Now you might be saying, this piece has nothing to do with the holiday’s… and you might be exactly right. So just think about it as our musical gift to you since we won’t be posting for a few days... it’s Christmas after all. We think this pod is sweet and heartwarming just like Rupa herself, and we hope it gets you through the Christmas madness.

However, giving props to our friend Niko isn't the only reason we're posting this pod. Jeremey actually helped out with the shoot. He shot the interviews and the practice stuff, and he also helped out a lot with drinking whiskey at the show. So this pod is sort of like second cousin to a TeamJaded Production. We hope you like it, and if you do, then head here and leave a comment for Nicolette, she did a rad job with it.

If you want to know more about Rupa and the April Fishes go here. They have free downloads, cd's to buy, and all kids of other cool stuff on their website. We recommend hearing them live, their French gypsy thing is pretty enthralling. And Rupa… well she’s like some kind of musical doctor/ saint... definitely worth checking out.

In other Current TV news, their new website is all pimped out Web 2.0 steez, so we went over there and tagged all Jeremey’s old pods and the two TeamJaded pods “TeamJaded.” Now if you search for TeamJaded on Current.com all our stuff comes up. Go over there and leave us some comments.

Bingeaux!

Louisiana is it’s own country.


Well, at least it feels like it. Driving down I-10, I was bombarded by a language of words I’d never seen… or heard. In fact, I’m pretty sure without a Louisiana native reading the road signs, I’d have no idea what these words even sounded like.

For example: Atchafalaya. Or Calcasieu. Or try this one: Tchoupitoulas.

The only true Louisiana word I had come in contact with prior to this experience was "Lagniappe" (at TV Land we would make promos called “Lagniappes” because they served no functional purpose other than being entertaining). Coincidentally, about 8 years ago, Jeremey worked at Lagniappe Magazine in Lake Charles, LA.

Anyhoo, in the past few weeks, I’ve acquired a whole new vocabulary. And let me tell you, Louisianans sure know how to make speaking entertaining. Seriously, say these words out loud. I promise, they’re fun to say. Kinda like the word “Mahogany” (it just rolls off your tongue, right?).

And now I present:

Abby’s List of Fun Louisiana Words! (click on the words to learn what they are)

Boudin: [boo-DAN]
Étouffée: [ey-too-fey]
Jambalaya: juhm-buh-lahy-uh]
Gumbo: [guhm-boh]
Bayou: [bahy-oo]
Creole: [kree-ohl]
Doubloons: [dŭ-blōōn]
Gris Gris: [gree-gree]
Muffuletta: [muhf-uh-laht-uh]
Picayune: [pik-ee-yoon]
Pirogue: [pee-row] Not to be confused with the Polish "Pierogi"
Iowa: [eye-uh-way]
Bingeaux: [Bingo]

They don't have Counties here either... they have Parishes. And apparently state law is based on Napoleonic Code. Now you know why Louisiana is basically another country.

Also, on a final note, say this word out loud (for real): "Oyster"
Did you say "Oi-stchur" or "Oi-ster"?
Just wondering.

Ode to the Chug House

Here's a little Tuesday 2 Live Crew from the archives...

Cheers! Tiki Bar TV & Pimm's Cup

My favorite drink is the Pimm's Cup. The Pimm's Cup is a delicious cocktail consisting of:

1-2 shots Pimm's No. 1 Liqueur
Ginger Ale
Lemonade (or Champagne)
Cucumbers
(with additional and variations on these ingredients)

So if you enjoy reading teamjaded with a refreshing cocktail, I can guarantee you’ll love watching Tiki Bar TV. After only a couple episodes, you’ll realize every problem can be solved with a great cocktail! The production, acting, and writing is superb. And to that, I say “Cheers!” Or if I were in another country I might say:

Belgium: Op Uw Gezonheid!
China: Wen Lie!
Denmark: Skal!
Ethiopia: Letenatchie!
Germany: Prosit!
Indonesia: Selamat!
Israel: L'Chayim!
Italy: Alla Salute!
Japan: Kanpai!
Morocco: Saha Wa Afiab
Poland: Na Zdrowie!
Russia: Jobnyem!
South Africa: Gesonoheid!
Spain & Mexico: Salud!
Sweden: Skal!
Ukraine: Bud'mo! (how has Budweiser not jumped on that one?)

Below find two fabulous videos. The first is Tiki Bar TV: episode 25, “Blue Hawaiian (guest staring Diggnation’s own Kevin Rose). The second is an intricate recipe on how to make your own Pimm's Cup. Teamjaded asks you to please watch responsibly.

"Who says gentrification isn't funny?"

Apparently I’m out of touch. I just found “The Burg.” I know what you’re probably thinking… and the Staged Play version of our conversation would go a little something like this:

ACT ONE
Scene 1

You: [confused / concerned] Uh, Abby… I thought you were really into the whole ‘Internet TV’ thing.
Me: [fiddling with hands, pretends not to be ashamed] Uh, yes. Yes I am.
You: But how could you have NOT known about “The Burg.”
Me: [searching for answers] Maybe it’s because I moved away from New York? You know I live in SF now. And, uh, you know it’s all about Williamsburg. Get it? The Burg?! Woo.
You: Well, um, everyone knows about it. It’s been on Internet for over a year. Plus, they’ve been featured everywhere- from the New York Times to Wired.
Me: [looks longingly towards the computer screen, world freezes, proceed with soliloquy] You’ve let me down, Internets. YOU’VE let me down!! How could this have happened!!! [drops to knees] NOOOOO!

END SCENE

Well, technically the Internet didn’t let me down. It was just over a year late updating me on said IPTV program. I’m not even going to write on how good (or bad) the actual show is. Mainly, I want to point out 5 things.

1. High quality TV on the Internet. Bang. It’s happening. Thank you.
2. “Who says Gentrification isn’t funny?” No one. And that’s why this works.
3. Ad Sponsors. Nice work, my friends.
4. It’s Williamsburg in all its beauty: “Trust fund kids pretend to be starving artists, starving artists pretend to be able to live completely off of credit cards, and everybody pretends not to notice."
5. Which perfectly leads into the last point. They should do an episode in the Mission in SF. It could be exactly the same show except fixed-gears could make an appearance. Although maybe The Burg has field-tripped to the Barmuda Triangle*, I haven’t watched them all. Actually, I’ve watched about approximately .08% of the episodes. Don’t tell.

So there you have it. Another IPTV show, doin' it. For you. Enjoy.



*attributed to Lector Mangrave.

Funny. And Sad.

Funny. And Sad.



Funny. And Sad. (Murphy's Law at it's finest)





Funny. And Sad.



David Segal from the Washington Post wrote quite possibly the best article on how 15 seconds of fame has a whole new meaning thanks to online video. He starts:

There was a time, not long ago, when a 10-year-old boy could head to a neighborhood fair, get his face painted like a Halloween zombie and blurt out something utterly inane to a local TV news correspondent and nobody would ever think about it again... more.

Swivel-icious

We're smack in the middle of Shark Week on the Discovery Channel. Let it be known that I have no inkling of excitement for Shark Week. Sharks do not interest me. At all. But for those of you who do enjoy the man-eating-slayer-toothed-water-beast, here's a nice graph from Swivel:



I was pretty psyched when I stumbled across Swivel. Now, I’m hooked. As a journalism graduate, I was dismayed at the lack of statistical data used to back up news stories. It was as if I learned that emotion is more powerful than fact. And sadly, this may be true. But, if our emotions aren’t based in fact, then we are naively accepting the passions of the day (slightly 1984ish don’t you think?).

However, we’re told that facts, data, graphs, and charts… all these things are boring. In college it’s required to take physics, statistics, science, etc, and if these topics aren’t your bag, then out the door with ‘em!

Not true.

I know it’s in our human nature to want to understand. It’s the monotony of the typical data that weighs us down. When presented in a meaningful, and easy to understand way, it’s then we can grasp a true sense of the world around us. When facts aren’t accessible (be it visually or physically) we lose an important part of being a rational, critically thinking human being.

We can now be engaged with true statistics (sources are sited on Swivel) without having to comb through layers of opinionated blogs, emotion riddled news stories, and imaginary corporate lexicon.

Now, you will find that Chinese food isn’t the only thing with MSG.
You can legitimately freak out about Bird Flu… if you live in Azerbaijan.
AND, place bets on where your local church will take their next mission trip.

Best [Pic] Week Ever.

I spent a good portion of last week being sick. Therefore, I spent a good portion of last week on the internet. Let me tell you, it was a week rich with visual stimuli.

I now present the top pics of the week:

1. Scared of Tobacco or Terrorists? (technically a graph, but go with it)
2. Phonetically Correct-ish.
3. 120 Calories. The British way. (Can anyone tell me what mini scotch eggs are? They look like chicken nugget balls.)
4. Really? Does your mom know you did that?
5. Funny, cause it's true. (and technically a comic, but go with it)
6. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. (That is not a typo)
7. Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu. (That is not a typo)
8. Best Anti-War Graffiti Ever.

Stuff On My Cat, My Cat On Stuff

Stuff On My Cat

Updated 7/20/2007: Thank you so much to Mario at Stuff On My Cat for posting our video and linking to our blog! Thank you to everyone who commented and enjoyed Maggie's 'stackage'. You're all amazing.

Although we at TeamJaded are dedicated to interesting news, people, and the occasional politics, we do enjoy our fare share of fun websites. I for one, am a huge fan of Stuff on My Cat. Everyday it makes me smile. So when we purchased a new camera (Canon XH-A1), I decided to shoot my cat while figuring out the settings. What happened was something I never expected. A video where I put stuff… on my cat. Yes, you read that right. It’s slightly amusing, as Maggie (my cat), acts as if nothing is happening.

A while back I wrote about Maggie. I thought I’d share it with you now that you know how deceivingly cute she can be.

This was written August 12, 2006, 9 days after I moved from NYC to SF.

I have a foster cat. Her name is Maggie.

Last week Maggie went on the most exciting adventure up to this point in her 2-year-old life. However, I presume the trip from east coast to west coast may have been more exciting for the passengers on Jet Blue Flight 97.

Upon boarding the plane, it was realized that the cage she was traveling in was approximately 'yay' centimeter too big to fit under the seat in front of me. Maggie, cage, and I proceeded to the rear of the plane hoping for a smooth transfer into the airline-supplied cage.

All goes smoothly, and Maggie pops her little head out of the top of the gated cage. Then she pops her front paws out. Then she wiggles a bit. I'm trying desperately to push her resisting body back into the cage, only to realize her harness (yes, she's wearing a harness) is caught on the wires. She looks frantic. She's wriggling with all her might. The passengers are now crowding around the scene like lookie-loos in an accident. Maggie is caught halfway in and halfway out of the plastic-bottom, wire-top box. Finally the man in front of me picks her and the cage up, takes her to the back and finesses her out. We lock the hole with a twisty tie. Maggie, all tuckered out from her exhausting and embarrassing endeavor, sleeps the entire 6-hour flight.

Please allow me to delve in all that is Maggie the Cat.

When I decided to house this cat for "a six week trial period", I must admit, I wasn't what one would call "smart" about this decision. In fact, I fully take responsibility for my somewhat ill-advised act of altruistic feline charity.

My hopes of having a companion of independent temperament, who required little to no attention was to be found in a small little ball of fur with unclipped claws.

Cute? She was. Friendly? She was not.

Twiggy was her shelter moniker. Sadly, the stick-like underfed cat that she was fit the ridiculous name. A fierce growl, squinted eyes, and turned down ears was how she welcomed my hand as I tried to pet her calico fur. No such luck. She retreated to the corner of her newspaper-lined cell, foot stepping into her water bowl.

"I'll take her," I say. It was as though all my intelligent senses had taken a coffee break; and while my brain cells were dipping biscotti in espresso, I accepted this miniature life into my studio apartment. For better or for worse, in sickness & in health, 'till "six weeks later" do we part.

Eight months and 2582 miles later, Maggie Francois Scratcher, is still my foster cat. No official adoption has been made, as the shelter never called to check on their precious little demon.

Maggie has successfully wrecked a linen closet, demolished 2 large cardboard boxes, ruined the armrests of a corporate housing suede couch, and, among other things, peed on a suitcase.

She runs laps around the apartment at 5 in the morning. She will attack ankles if not fed at a proper time. She growls with a haunting, low snarl in the middle of the night, hair on end, eyes fixated on emptiness. She tries to escape every time the front door is opened... or the window on a 26-floor apartment.

Now, these things aside, Maggie has learned to be quite the friendly cat. She enjoys a nice bout of catnip therapy, a good tummy rub and a playful jaunt with a menacing ball of trash.

For those who are wondering why her name was changed, please refer to the following songs.

There's actually a song called 'Maggie the Cat' by The Bangs. I have yet to hear it.

Rod Stewart: Maggie May
Oh Maggie I wish I'd never seen your face
You made a first-class fool out of me
But I'm as blind as a fool can be
You stole my heart but I love you anyway
Maggie I wish I'd never seen your face
I'll get on back home one of these days

Beatles: Maggie Mae
Oh dirty Maggie Mae they have taken her away
And she never walk down Lime Street any more
Oh the judge he guilty found her
For robbing a homeward bounder
That dirty no good robbin' Maggie Mae

If one is the lonliest number...

Apparently two can be as sad as one, but I’ve always wondered about three through six. What are they? Why don’t they get to have any intrinsic qualities? Good thing we know seven is the luckiest number.

So, I guess that makes this month (July) the luckiest month during the luckiest year (‘07). How fitting that the new Seven Wonders of the World were announced recently? It’s hard to believe the Pyramids in Egypt didn’t make the cut. I also must admit, I didn’t realize we could actually change the Seven Wonders of the World. I mean, if there were more Wonders, shouldn't we just make Eight, or Nine Wonders? I guess people just like keeping it lucky.

And speaking of Seven Wonders, did you know Gandhi made a list he dubbed, “The Seven Blunders of the World?” Now, I guess I’ve never met Mr. Mahatma, but I didn’t think he was that cheesy. The list however, is something right up his alley. The Seven Blunders are:

1. Wealth without work
2. Pleasure without conscience
3. Knowledge without character
4. Commerce without morality
5. Science without humanity
6. Worship without sacrifice
7. Politics without principle

Some relate this list to the seven deadly sins. I guess they could redo the movie "Se7en", but this time Brad Pitt’s job would be really easy. He would just arrest the President and the Vice President.

Daily Smarts

It’s blatantly obvious that I enjoy a good bout of The Daily Show/ Colbert Report. Besides nerdy History Channel & Discovery Channel shows, these two Comedy Central staples complete my TV repertoire. And thankfully, I never watch the network news. It turns out (surprise!) I’m smarter for watching Jon and Steven. According to a recent study, Fox News viewers aren’t up to par when it comes to current events.

And... one would have hoped the Internet would have spewed out a bit of enlightened knowledge on the American public, but sadly, only 69% of people today can name… the Vice President. Apparently, Cheney is really good at keeping information from the public.

But thanks to wikipedia, we can all ooze our vast and unending knowledge into the “free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.” Your wikiality is my wikiality. But who’s wikiality is bigger, you ask? Katie Holmes or Oliver Wendell Holmes? And don’t ask if they mean the Poet or the Supreme Court Justice. Test your knowledge here.